Lea saw line 42 already appearing around the corner and started running.
The bus arrived early as always, which officially wasn’t true, because according to the schedule buses never arrived early. They were only late or “on time.” Lea thought that was a lie adults had made up so that teenagers looked worse in the morning.
Her backpack hit her hip as she ran over the wet sidewalk. The laces of her left shoe were untied, her hair stuck to her forehead from the drizzle, and of all days, today she felt like the whole world was watching.
Of course, not the whole world was watching.
Only him.
Noah was standing at the stop, one hand in his jacket pocket, the other on his phone. He looked up exactly at the moment Lea almost tripped over the curb.
She just managed to catch herself.
Very elegantly.
Almost like an injured flamingo with a math book.
Noah grinned briefly but said nothing.
That made it worse.
Lea reached the stop, pulled her hood deeper over her face, and pretended she had planned that near-fall exactly that way.
“Sporty,” said Noah.
Lea didn’t look at him.
“Training.”
“For what?”
“Survival in this city.”
Noah laughed quietly.
It wasn’t a loud laugh. Not a laugh that made fun of someone. More like one that moved somewhere between friendly and cautious.
Lea hated that she liked it.
The bus hissed to a stop in front of them. The doors opened, warm air came out, mixed with the smell of wet jackets, old rubber, and too strong deodorant. Lea got on, held her ticket to the reader, and immediately looked for a seat far enough from Noah to seem normal but close enough not to look like she was running away from him.
There was no such seat.
Of course not.
The bus was full.
Lea stood in the aisle and held onto a pole. Two stops later, a seat right next to her became free.
Noah didn’t sit down.
He stayed standing.
Next to her.
“You can sit down,” said Lea.
“You too.”
“I said it first.”
“True. Then you win.”
“But I don’t want to win.”
Noah looked at her briefly.
“Then we both lose.”
Lea had to smile, even though she didn’t want to.
She turned her head to the window so he wouldn’t see it.
Outside, gray houses passed by, shop windows with half-lit lights, people under umbrellas, and bicycles that looked like they had lost faith in spring.
It was a perfectly normal Thursday morning.
And that was exactly what made Lea nervous.
Because for three weeks now, Noah was no longer just any boy from her grade.
Three weeks ago, he had sat next to her in German because his actual seat had been blocked by Tom and his endless energy drink cans. They had to analyze a poem together. Lea had found the poem boring, Noah had said it was just in a bad mood, and somehow they had talked for ten minutes afterward about things that had nothing to do with German class.
Since then, he greeted her.
Not always.
But often enough that she noticed.
And rarely enough that she got unsure every time.
The problem wasn’t that Lea had never been in love before.
The problem was that she didn’t know if she was this time.
Maybe she just found Noah nice.
Maybe she found him more than nice.
Maybe her brain was just broken because it stopped for a moment every time he said her name.
“Lea?”
She jumped.
“What?”
Noah looked at her questioningly.
“You just looked very serious out the window.”
“I’m thinking.”
“About what?”
“Buses.”
“Buses?”
“Yes. Their social role.”
Noah nodded slowly.
“Sounds important.”
“It is.”
That quiet laugh again.
Lea felt her face warm and was grateful the bus was stuffy anyway. Then the driver braked suddenly. Someone further ahead cursed. Lea briefly lost her balance.
Noah automatically grabbed her arm.
Not tightly.
Just briefly.
Just long enough so she wouldn’t fall against the seat in front of her.
“Everything okay?” he asked.
Lea nodded too quickly.
“Yes. Of course.”
He let go.
Immediately.
Almost too quickly.
And that annoyed her, even though she had no idea what she had actually expected.
At school, they got off with a small wave of other students. The rain had eased, but the sky looked like it was just resting briefly. Lea pulled her backpack higher and headed toward the entrance.
Noah walked beside her.
For a while, neither said anything.
That was new.
Usually, Lea immediately filled silence with some sentence, even if it was unnecessary. But this time she stayed quiet because she was afraid of saying something stupid.
And because at the same time she hoped Noah would say something.
He suddenly stopped in front of the stairs.
“Are you at the project meeting this afternoon?”
Lea looked at him.
“Which project meeting?”
“History. Group work. Mrs. Krüger said yesterday we should divide the topics after the sixth period today.”
Lea closed her eyes briefly.
Of course.
She had forgotten.
“Right,” she said. “Yeah. I guess I am.”
“Good.”
That one word hung between them for a moment.
Good.
Not practical.
Not okay.
Good.
Lea knew you shouldn’t read too much into a single word. She had told herself that many times. People constantly said words without sending secret messages.
Still, her head did.
Immediately.
Why good?
Good because she was reliable?
Good because he didn’t want to be there alone?
Good because he wanted to see her?
Or good because good just meant good?
“See you later,” said Noah.
“See you later,” Lea replied.
He went toward the physics room.
Lea stood still a second too long.
Then she noticed her best friend Mia waiting at the entrance, looking at her with a glance that roughly said: I saw everything and you will explain every detail to me.
Lea went to her.
“Don’t say anything,” she murmured.
Mia raised her hands.
“I didn’t say anything.”
“Your face did.”
“My face is honest.”
“Your face exaggerates.”
Mia grinned.
“So, Noah.”
Lea immediately looked away.
“No.”
“That wasn’t a no. That was a panic no.”
“There are no panic nos.”
“Yes, there are. And yours even had subtitles.”
Lea pushed Mia through the entrance door.
“We have class.”
“We have drama first.”
“I said math.”
“I’m telling you.”
Lea had to laugh, but only briefly. Because as she went up the stairs with Mia, she thought again about the afternoon.
About the project meeting.
About Noah’s “Good.”
And about how she suddenly wished history would last a very long time today.
That was definitely a bad sign.
Or a good one.
Lea wasn’t sure.
Not yet.